Where have all the Gentleman Gone?

It seems like a silly question, but in fact it is the very reason I started this blog. I look around today and see all the chaos going in the world such as the Greek crisis, terrorists attacks, a man hacking up a woman in broad day light with a machete and lets not forget Men claiming to be women and a white woman claiming to a black women. Is it me or has the world just simply gone crazy?

I am not going to debate the politics of the world that is not what I am trying to accomplish here. I am not smart enough to fix the problems of the world so I am not going to even try. It just I look at things today and it brings a tear to my eye. All the things that my parents have taught me seem to be all backwards now. Where did we go wrong? Or is the way things are today better?

I am not sure what is right or wrong all I know is the way I was taught. When you watch old movies all the men were gentlemen and all the women were ladies. They dressed like gentlemen; they acted like gentlemen, because they were gentlemen.

What changed over the past 50 years why are men no longer gentlemen? I pondered this question and he is my theory.

First the change in the home, I think this has been the most dramatic change. Over 50% of marriages end in divorce and as a result there isn’t a man in the house helping with the raising of children. Yes divorced Dad’s for the most part try and do their best, but they are not there everyday to instruct their sons those tasks are left to the mother. While a mother is the greatest person alive they are not the fathers and every boy needs a father.

Secondly, out society as diminished the women for decades. What do I mean by this; women have been portrayed as sex objects for years. Movies, TV shows, and advertising portray women as sex objects and don’t think for a moment it doesn’t sell products because it does. Women don’t help this image shows like Real Housewives of wherever portray women as greedy gold digging bitches. Then there is Kim Kardashian and the whole clan. Here is a woman that is admired by millions and has earned millions. How did she get famous by doing a sex movie is this a real good way to prove to your daughters on how to make it.

Third people feel entitled to everything, from always being happy to getting everything handed to them. I am not sure if giving a trophy to every kid is responsible or not but I am sure it doesn’t help. Disappointment is part of life and we need people to learn how to deal with it and making everything better doesn’t help.

Fourth the general lack of respect for people and older people. When I was a kid I addressed all adults as Mr. Mrs. Or Miss and their last name. Never would I address an adult by their first name. My father would have smacked me. Yes there was the occasion that you would address a close friend to your parents as either uncle or aunt. We all have aunts and uncles that are really not our aunts or uncles. There is lack of respect in all walks of life, at work the boss is no longer respected, police officers are no longer respected, and teachers are no longer respected. It is a dam shame and some needs to make it stop.

Fifth we are just too dam casual. I walk the streets and I am amazed how men dress. They look like slobs, their clothes suck, and they don’t comb their hair. I don’t know if they even shower everyday. General George Patton once said, “They don’t look like soldiers, they don’t dress like soldiers, they don’t act like soldiers, why do you expect them to fight like soldiers”. So I say to all you men out there: YOU DON’T SPEAK LIKE GENTLEMAN, YOU DON’T DRESS LIKE GENTLEMAN, YOU DON’T GROOM YOURSELF LIKE A GENTLEMAN, HOW DO YOU EXPECT TO ACT LIKE A GENTLEMAN

Sixth, the art of conversation, people don’t talk to people anymore. Now we send emails and text messages and post on Facebook, Twitter and whatever other social media is out there. Please people put the smart phone down and talk to people.

There are probably more things contributing to the downfall of the gentlemen, but I think this is a good start. So how do we fix this problem, because it is not going to be easy, but the fix does depend on you?

First look to your father or grandfather as role models. If they are not good role models find one. Find a gentleman, whether it’s an old actor like Cary Grant or Fred Astaire or a mentor at work. Find someone who you respect and learn from him.

Secondly treat every woman you meet, as you would treat your mother. Be respectful to her, stand up when she stands up, open a door for her, let her in the elevator and off the elevator first.   Don’t use foul language in front of her. She is a lady and she should be treated as suck.

Third lose your sense of entitlement. You have the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness that’s it. You don’t have a right to be happy or to get everything you want. If you want something earn it don’t look for handouts from someone else. Take responsibility for you actions.

Fourth show people respect! Treat people how you want to be treated. I don’t care if it the bus boy at a restaurant or the CEO of your company. Treat everyone you meet with RESPECT. You will be amazed how people will react to you.

Fifth – Groom yourself, manicures pedicures comb your hair and for god’s sake wear decent clothes. Casual attire has its place in the world, but not in the business world. I don’t care what people say when you put on a suit and you are dressed people treat you differently and show you more respect. You feel better about yourself and if you buy clothes that fit you properly they are very comfortable.

Lastly, let’s start by putting down our smart phones and talk to people. When you sit to eat a meal or go to a bar for a cocktail have a no phone zone. Too many times I see a group of people together and nobody is talking to each other.   If your friend can’t make it too bad they should of come. Frank Sinatra had a toast he used to make “To All Our Friends who couldn’t be here – FUCK’EM”

Again I don’t know if this will solve all of our problems, but it’s a start. They recently asked Tony Bennett how come you were a suit and tie everyday? “He said to be different”. So men out their Let’s Be Different. Let’s get dressed up and treat people with respect just to be different and just maybe we can change the course of this crazy world we live in.